If you prick me, it hurts...

Have been following on and off this story of the Chinese-American girl fatally-stabs-mother-to-death. Recently, she was sentenced to 8 years. One side says mother was crazy controlling, the other says the kid was wrong in the head despite being a straight-A student and pianist. It happens..this side taking, and since this is all filtered through Kansas City news reporting, I'm wary to form a strong opinion. But what surprises me is that she was calm enough after the killing to continue updating her Live Journal through her friends. And I must say in parts her writing was thoughtful and poignant for a 16 year old. In most other parts is was pure expletive (hah). That apart, the thing that stood out was she-killed-her-mother, and that this is pretty common place (although matricide amongst adolescents is apparently rare). And then in the same reporting frames I see all of the Indian politician story, and the Nepal killings a few years ago. Three examples amongst the sea that exist out there. Three of the many publicized, while many other stories die in their own cosmoses. Rage vs. Relationship.

But the fact that they do exist is an important one. From my personal-frame-of-reference stance, these types of familial killings are just unacceptable. Not the unacceptability of the killer to kill, nor of the unacceptability of provocation by the victim. But in general unacceptable for *drum roll* society. It makes me angry and it also makes me sad. And not just for the extreme violence cases, but even for the less extreme. I, of course, live in my own wonderful world where family is super. Some culture and some individualistic; both cause the parental units and I to hit it off very well. But, I of course also know that I got lucky. Way lucky. And it saddens in a very encompassing way to see the daughter who doesn't talk to mother, the brother who refuses to acknowledge the brother, or the father vowing never to see his son again.

Relationship--its such a strained word. I cannot believe it was meant to be this way. Of course, I inhabit that place in the clouds, but it nevertheless causes the saddening. And being of a policy bent, I tend to ask: what can be done? Can anything be done?

Many variables confound--norms, personalites, civics, culture stuff. So maybe nothing can be done on a large scale for the sake of relationship. And also, often other matters seem more pressing. Small wonder then that the UNDP funds women's nutrition and not family therapy. Small wonder then that governments give for tsunami rebuilding and not so much for social (and mental) rehabilitation. Small wonder then. But it is not a rungs on the ladder type deal. Relationship is more like the rail that holds the rungs together, or not. So maybe this ignoring of relationship is not right..maybe.

Anyway, to end on a less contemplative and happier note, its Daddy's 50th bday soon. So, Happy Birthday Daddy!!!! :) Hope you have a great day, year, etcetera. More to follow via USPS. Oh, btw, does anyone know how international post works? If I pay at my counter in Indiana, who pays the India postal system folks that deliver the goods? Are there international agreements on this? Maybe this was one of those duh type life-lesson-tidbits that I was supposed to have picked up along the way, but, that I oh so obviously did not pick up. As per usual.